Monday, 2 August 2010

It's a thin line....

Where does one draw the line between being caring friends, and stating-the-obvious advice?  

It is 5 weeks since the crash, and I've been home for nearly 3 of those. I have discovered my limitations, and am living by them; occasionally something more comes up so I have to compensate for it by resting before or after it. I am 44 years old, female, sensible, and in the vein of a witness statement, "I consider myself to be an intelligent human being."  Yet friends still feel that they have to tell me to be careful, or take it easy; or not do to much or see too many people, in case I tire myself out.  Do they not trust me to know my limits or take responsibility for myself?

I keep telling myself that it's because people care, but I can't help that little bubble of irritation welling up... maybe I need to calm down and not overdo it; emotion can be terribly tiring.


  1. Maybe because we can't think of anything but the obvious to say? Can't really imagine the frustrations/pain/worry whatever of what you are going through but we have all 'done too much' and regretted it on some lesser occasion. It's very negative though isn't it. Your days must also be full of successes and achievements and 'I couldn't do that yesterday or last week'. And finding a new bit of yourself that can cope with this and finds ways around the frustrations - and the dog.

  2. Yes I think it is the negativity I hate, it brings me down.

    I have one particular friend who I put off calling, because I knew that he would annoy me by being, not patronising but 'teaching grandmother to suck eggs'! And when he called me it was exactly as predicted. Yet on the other hand I have friends who I feel might push me the other way and think I can do more than I can. It's a big balancing act!


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