Farewell to Spot..

11/12/13 might have been a lucky date for some, but for us yesterday evening marked both the end of a long friendship, and the end of an era. After a very difficult year for Django, and for me and Mr H, just one month off his 14th birthday we let our puppy go before he began suffering any more. No matter how right the decision, it is the hardest thing any pet owner has to do, and nothing prepares you for the hole it leaves in your heart.

Over those 14 years, but particularly since he became the lone dog in our house early in 2008, Django shared experiences with us from camping holidays in Scotland to patiently hanging around while we indulged our new motorsport hobby. He spent many weeks accompanying Mr H on his Forestry Commission work in Scotland in all weathers, and made human friends wherever he went.

As a youngster from 6 months old until he was about two, Django (aka Pebblegate Blackjack at Lightspeed) tolerated the dog-showing world with many class wins and a placing at Crufts Dog Show. However, he retired from the show ring when he remained smaller than the breed standard height (and we were getting tired of the politics anyway), so spent the rest of his life blissfully un-washed and un-fussed over, while retaining his fear of slippery wooden school hall floors! His early showing years did mean that he was comfortable with having his mouth / ears / feet investigated and examined, and he was totally trusting of people. On one occasion he let us extract a large piece of wood that had embedded itself in his pad, without a murmur.

Django's favourite place was on our laps at the end of the day, where he would relax like a ragdoll and drop into such a deep sleep that it was hard to wake him to put him to bed!  His clock was set for 9pm when he would come and give us That Look, before either being invited up or just working his way up one paw at a time. His other main interests were pheasants, cats, food and sitting down. Much fonder of people than other dogs, Django could take it or leave it when he met dogs on walks, and could not understand it if they tried imposing their dominance. Django had nothing to prove, he was just cool.

We will truly miss the company of this very special dog.   And the end of an era? Mr H has never known a house without dogs, and I only had a 5 year gap as a teenager, before getting my own puppy  almost 30 years ago.   Life is going to be very different....

Django on Forestry Commission duty in Scotland

Mind over matter

An interesting thing has come to my attention this week. For the last few weeks my leg has been giving me trouble, ie. pain. I have started having remedial massage therapy to try and break down the scar tissue on the muscle on the outer thigh, just two sessions so far. It hurts quite a lot while she is doing it, but feels amazing afterwards - no pain at all! But then it wears off after a couple of days.

This week, my mother has gone down with pneumonia again, and the dog has contracted gastro-enteritis, so I've had a bit to think about. Thankfully Mum has been transferred to hospital, later than she should have been. My poor father had to cope with a couple of falls and confusion caused by low oxygen levels, it's a good thing we live close by and they have other good friends who stood in while we were away at the weekend. Now at least Mum will get the treatment she needs.

Meanwhile Django became ill on Sunday while we were away and the vet thinks it is gastro-enteritis, his kidneys, liver and bloods looking generally ok. There is one more test to do for his pancreas which we have not had the results for yet. So, he has an upset tummy and right now he can't go into kennels as was planned this weekend.

So, the interesting thing I have noticed is that while I've been worrying about Mum and Django my leg has been hurting less. Even after some lawn-mowing yesterday evening, and having forgotten to take the Dihydrocodeine the last two days.

I think this goes to show how powerful a painkiller distraction can be!

Spot's Spot

Not written by Spot because he has a bit of a hangover.. well actually no, he has apparently probably had a kind of stroke on Saturday during the night. It seems a more likely reason than the possibility of him drinking the bourbon.  We were both pretty upset seeing him not being able balance and falling over, and apart from the obvious reasons of seeing a loved pet not being 'normal' it is a stark reminder that he's not getting any younger, he'll be 13 in January.

He has remained pretty cheerful though, the tail still wagging and certainly no reduction in appetite!  Just an odd look behind the eyes, and a lot of "whoa boy, take it easy with the turning around" from us. On Sunday he spent the day watching us cutting wood and then retired to his bed for the afternoon, we left the door open so he could come and go. He has some odd, short episodes before but very short lived ie. 5-10 minutes, so we didn't panic but planned to take him to the vet this morning.

The vet sent him home with a variety of tablets and another appointment on Wednesday, and he seems to be a bit better this evening, more sturdy on his legs. The vet says he should either recover completely, or at least almost completely, we'll just have to wait and see.

He was certainly pretty happy that we gave him homemade stew gravy to eat his tablets with this evening, although he still managed to avoid one last bit of pink one which then had to be held in his mouth until he gave in and swallowed...!

A little monkey even when the brain's not working quite properly ;)

Hummm

I tried a Zumba dance class tonight, which turned out to be an hour of trying to work out what she was doing and translate that into what my body should be doing, and mostly not getting it quite right. It was a bit like being thrown in the deep end, which I don't like.   I remember feeling like that when I started choreographed dance classes on the 3rd week and felt totally out of my depth; but of course once I got used to it, and started learning it, I loved it.  So I won't chuck this away on this one experience.

I used to do dancing quite regularly but not for 3 years or so, and I have totally lost that flexibility and wiggle.. ok not that I ever had much but I could shimmy ok!  Now I feel stiff and ungainly especially when comparing myself with the sylph-like teacher who was hip-swinging her way through the moves.  And my brain hurt. And my leg hurts. And I'm tired  Hummm I think it's time for a rest from the gym for the rest of this week.

I used to have a good workout routine going: Tuesday and Thursday evenings and something at the weekend, and it was just right.  Then a lot of the staff changed and the timetable changed and I haven't got back into to a new routine yet, so now I end up going more than I really want to, plus I've been trying out different things which is good but I haven't enjoyed them all. So I'm feeling a bit down right now about the whole thing; I must sit down and work out which classes I want to do and settle into a new routine.

I need routine now anyway, because my OU study books have just arrived, whoohoo!  It doesn't start until the beginning of October and the website doesn't open until 27 September but I can start reading. I must decide when and where I am going to do my studying... somehow I managed it with Mr H home from January to May this year but I can't remember how!

The final instructions have just come through for my next hill climb (and last for 2012), it's on the 21st Sept so I'm looking forward to that.  Mr H says he feels as though he should be working on the car! I suggested he went round and checked all the nuts and bolts in the suspension ;)  I'm sure Django will be happy to help him as always....

Before that, however, we have the Goodwood Revival to go to this Sunday. Rosie, bless her, has offered the use of their cottage up the road from Goodwood for Saturday night so we will make a weekend of it.  As this is Mr H's birthday present it will be a nice extra. We're going in the Imp so will be parked in the pre-1971 carpark, and have some suitably 'period' style clothes to wear.

Well it's time for a cup of tea, so goodnight for now,
Jx

Shower thoughts

Thinking in the shower, often a mistake for me.  This evening I was mulling over some of the things said on Monday.

On Monday, Mr H and I drove 3 hours to see my solicitor and a barrister about my case, well worth the trip as the barrister was very nice and explained everything extremely clearly.  It is 2 years since the crash and my physical improvement (ie. discomfort and pain) over the last few months has slowed to a crawl; psychological improvement is better, with the odd relapse. As I have mentioned on here before, I detest spurious personal injury claims, but this one seemed to happen of its own accord after our crash, and it's not spurious in most people's eyes. Therefore however much I shy away from talking about it, I will because this is what I was thinking about - not the fact of there being a claim but some of the details, and the insight into how the legal system works (not having done this before).

Two things came out on Monday that annoyed me in the shower:

1.  The other driver's insurance company hasn't admitted liability yet.  This surprised me, since they have already accepted our claims for uninsured losses and made an interim payment.  So it is just them playing games - but to hear that they haven't admitted liability automatically opens up the possibility that they will suggest it was somehow partly my fault, despite all the evidence showing that it wasn't.  In the weeks after the crash, the grandparents of one of the passengers in the other vehicle put in a claim against my insurance... Mr H and I were gobsmacked - they had to be f*ing joking right?  I guess no-one had told them what actually happened...

2.  The barrister half joked that the law might consider a dog to be a 'chattel' and therefore argue against us claiming for the excess we had to pay on insurance for Django's veterinary bill.  I didn't think about this in the meeting, but how could someone argue that they won't pay up for that, yet not argue in the slightest about the cost of the replacement dog cage or a T-shirt? (chattels in anyone's language). The whole point of uninsured losses is to cover costs that we wouldn't have incurred had we not been hit in a head-on collision. And as for looking at Django as a chattel... well that upsets me a bit.  

Just thinking about the nitty gritty of things, now that we are likely to get to the arguing stages about wear and tear on my lost sunglasses and how much the pain I experience really affects my life, makes me want the whole thing over as soon as possible.

Then hopefully I will feel that I can truly move onwards and upwards.

Spot's Spot : what season is it?

Hello, Django here, sorry I've not posted for a while but I've been busy... er... sleeping and stuff. Oh and, you know, inspecting the garden and being really important.

It's been seriously hot here the last few days and yet getting dark at 7.30pm - it's all wrong!  I'm terribly confused, one minute it's autumn and the next it's mid-summer. Still, it's nice to get some extra sunbathing in...

I went to the office today but it was too warm, even though they put the fan on for me.  So I was a bit fidgety, I think Mum got a bit annoyed, oops.  I like it better there in the winter when the heater is on, then I'm happy just to sleep in front of it.

I've been promised an early walk tomorrow because it's going to be hot again, so I'd better get to bed - I need my beauty sleep you know!

Bye for now,
Django x

The week I've been waiting for

Mr H is home tomorrow!!!  for 10 days....  ooh will we still be speaking by the end of next week? ha.

And Django is coming back to stay for a couple of months.  I haven't missed him as much as usual, not sure why; but it will be nice to have company again and stop having to talk to myself.  

So tonight I will be putting the loud music on as it helps me concentrate on the clearing up the mess I live in, before he gets back. I may as well pretend to be one of those tidy wives haha ;-)

Recovering from a Buzzy weekend

I'm too tired to think of a clever-sounding blog post today, so I will instead treat you to some photos from my lovely weekend with Mr H. We spent most of it playing with bees, it's so good to feel enthusiastic about them again after a few disappointing years.

Here are the newly purchased Maisemore bees being transferred into their new home.

And for contrast, here are the Wild Woodside bees, undergoing serious surgery to try and get them into a useable hive.  After our last attempt when Mr H got stung rather a lot, they were remarkably calm this time, which was a) very surprising and b) a relief!

Much of the rest of the weekend we spent fixing up and sorting out all our hive bits, which has needed doing for a few years so that was good. We also spent an afternoon at a local Beer & Cider Festival, mainly because friends of ours were playing live so we went to hear them.  I was driving so Mr H managed to sample 4 pints of local ale, but was still good enough to cook me my favourite meal in the evening!

Finally, here is Spot all ready for his trip back North...  he's in the van as soon as he sees it open and being packed, just in case he misses out on anything!

Ssshhhhh....

Here I am.
In a very.Quiet. House.

Just me.
And the chirpy birds outside.

Mr H and Spot just left to go North.

I'm not too sad though, I just need to adjust to not having the 4-legged, waggy, hungry, spotty thing around, and I'll see them in the middle of June, if all goes to plan.

In the meantime, on with revision and determination to not just pass, but do the best I damn well can..16 days to Exam Day and then I'm on holiday for the summer!!

Oh, I'll still have the day job, but that's no sweat.

And... relax

Hey, well you'll be pleased to hear I'm feeling better since my last post.

Mr H reminded me that the only thing I have to do is Be Here.. which I knew already, but.   I will make the effort to clear a chair in the kitchen and another space on the table though ie. sort out the piles of paperwork which I just shuffle around to make room for a plate.

Gratuitous photograph: A little friend reading a letter

On Tuesday night I had a walk around the field with Django and decided I'd set myself too full a timetable for revising. Even walking the dog helps revision, as I go over things in my head and imagine trying to explain things to people.  So, I'll chill out a bit and also reduce the number of 'just in case' subjects I revise to a cursory read through later.  I'll concentrate on three and hopefully get to know them well enough that it doesn't matter what questions they hit us with on them.

Last night I went over to a friend's for tea of home-made lasagne, and not-so-home-made pavlova supplied by me. I was so tired when I got home from work that I fell asleep and only just woke up in time to go out!  But had a nice relaxing evening just chatting and was home at 10.30pm.

And at 10.30pm tonight I'll be waiting to pick up Mr H at the station - hurrah!  Django doesn't know yet, he will be so excited.

Have a great weekend everybody!

Aaagghh

I should be excited about Mr H coming home for the weekend, and I am of course, but I'm also feeling pretty stressed.

The house needs cleaning, the bed needs changing, have I got enough food? the right food? we've only got 3 nights and one of those we're going out - so I feel annoyed that Mum and Dad want to see us but of course they do and I can't get out of that one.

Three and a half days.. it just isn't long enough.

Django is doing my head in and I wish Mr H was driving down so he could take him back this weekend instead of me having him another two weeks.  I've got revision to do and a stupid pension form and PMS, and the dog whinging for attention constantly is REALLY not helping.

*Sigh* I know I will feel better once Mr H is here, but I'll feel even better when he's taken the whiny little brat to Scotland!

Sunbathing on Easter Weekend...?

Today I feel that I have been extremely lazy. This is based on the fact that I spent a large number of hours sitting on my sun lounger in the garden reading 'Atonement', drinking tea and watching the birds going about their business.

Normally this would be virtually impossible for me to achieve. I would end up weeding or doing other chores that need doing, and not being able to sit still. But since I had all those months sitting around unable to do things, I am much better at it now.

Django did much the same, except that he slept in various sunny/shady places around the garden instead of reading a book.

We were out walking at 7.15am up on the Forest this morning, and then I walked into town to the market for a few things, so I wasn't a complete slob.  And now it's shady so I have my chores to do - watering the vegetable patch.

On holiday! :-)

Well here I am, it's Friday night and I'm on holiday!!  at least sort of, I'm not leaving until Sunday lunchtime when I board a train to the Peak District (4 hours north of here) for a week away with Mr H.  I've just been on the phone to my dad's cousin who we are meeting while we are up there, she is great fun and we don't get to see her often enough.

Before then I have to do the packing, which is always difficult at a time of year when the weather could do absolutely anything.

Sooo not sure when I'll talk to you again but you can be sure there will be photos when I get back ;-)

In the meantime here are a couple of Django being not quite sure about a Shetland pony up on the Forest...

Brain dump

Thank goodness, I managed to get 550 words of Discussion down this evening in my qualitative research report. For the last week I've been going round in circles, changing my analysis themes and it just wasn't coming together and I was starting to panic.  Mind you I do that on every one - at some point in writing I decide that I Can't Do It and I have to get past that thought and put my mind to it. Let's hope the ICDI moment doesn't last too long in the exam!

Now I think I'm on track with this one so I'm very relieved.  I think there will  be a lot of editing at the end of though...

Django's presence has been requested in the office tomorrow so I guess I'll give him a treat and take him in either the morning or afternoon. I really need to cycle tomorrow sometime as I only have two days this week without medical / physio / dentist / haircut appointments to drive to.

We had another death in the office on Saturday... well not literally you understand, but my boss's mother died :-(  she was 87 and it was old age rather than anything specific, I think she just decided it was time to go. Let's hope that this run of mortalities among staff families is over for a while...

On a brighter note I saw the dental hygienist this morning, a breed normally known for terrorizing everyone who enters their room. But this one was very nice (may be something to do with being in a private practice). Admittedly she did some serious digging around in a couple of places but all in all said I was making a good effort - I felt like a kid who'd got a gold star at school!

Synchronising calendars

Last night Mr H and I sorted out when he would be having Django and when I will. It made me think of the friends and family who have wall-charts showing when each parent is going to have the children.. except that our arrangements are undoubtedly less traumatic.

So, the young man will be going up to Scotland for the summer, from the end of May to the beginning of September. I suppose it's rather like him 'taking a cottage for the summer' like families did in the old days - does anyone do that now?   It means he will be up there when I fly up for my birthday weekend which will be good; and leaves the summer free for me to go to sailing events without having to worry about him.

He'll be back down here from September to November - neatly coinciding with Mr H's trips south for hospital appointments and an Imelda May gig (ooh!).   Then back up north in November until Christmas.  

It makes the year seem very short, writing that.

Here is a picture of Django out on our walk this morning. No running around exploring for him when I stopped for a snack.. after he'd done some digging around in the bracken he took the opportunity for a kip!

And now for a short break....

Hello, just to let you know not to worry about me if I'm not around for a few days. It's time for my visit to see Mr H, I'm flying up tomorrow and can't wait! 

Django is going to stay with my parents for the first time; hopefully not the last. I guess that will depend on how much he whines during the night, right below their bedroom....

The work 'crisis' is sorted.  Not in the way we expected, but at least I had time to get some work done today before going away.

So, bye for now. Backson.

'Owl looked at the notice again. To one of his education the reading of it was easy.
"Gon out, Backson. Bisy, Backson" -- just the sort of thing you'd expect to see on a notice.
"It is quite clear what has happened , my dear Rabbit," he said.
"Christopher Robin has gone out somehwere with Backson. He and Backson are busy together.
Have you seen a Backson anywhere about in the Forest lately."'
 
from here