I am writing stuff in a letter to Mr H., and some of it I would probably also write about on here, but then by the time he gets my letter he'll already know about it, and you know how boring repeats are (unless they are particularly funny or have hot people in them).
So now I'm wondering what the hell to talk to you about, that I wouldn't put in a letter?
Well, I could talk about the question of how much our adult personality and behaviour has been changed and influenced by our peers. As I hinted at the other day, without those special people we spend time with, would we still be the people we are? how can we know without a 'control' version of ourselves who didn't meet those people, with which to compare?
I think that the time I have spent with Mr H. has had a massive effect on my self-confidence, my personality and my behaviour. But I only have my 19 year old self to compare with. Maybe if I'd married someone else and was a bullied mother of 7 children who got into trouble if dinner's not on the table at 6.30pm, I'd be a mouse. Or maybe not. I know it's an ugh-word, but the subject of 'empowering' keeps coming up in my life at the moment, and that's how I feel about the influence of Mr H and my other adult peers who I choose to spend time with.
I was thinking about the film Sliding Doors and it's a strange feeling that there may be however many more of me in parallel universes, living parallel lives... would I want one of their lives? Honestly, I don't think so (and I'm not just saying that because my man is reading!).
Talking of quantum mechanics, I keep coming across Max Planck recently. First I discovered numerous Max Planck Institutes (I'm sure I've mentioned the Institute for Psycholinguistics before) and now his name keeps popping up in stuff I'm reading. I don't read Hello magazine or Cosmo, which probably explains it. Not only did he have a cool real name, but he was a Nobel Prize winner in 1918, and one of his sons was executed for playing a part in the failed attempt to kill Hitler.
So anyway, blogging - where was I.....?
Me I'm happy with my lot, though I do sometimes regret not having the encouragement to focus on my art earlier. It has taken me a long time to realise that people get good by working at it rather than a mythical talent. Anyway not worth bothering about.
ReplyDeleteI can offer a theory for the sudden Max Planck thing - Our brains are so good at filtering informantion sort of making thing invisable that until it is brought to our attention we just don't see it. Kind of like when you get a dog every one else seems to have that breed as well. I wonder if you would like listening to the skeptics guide to the universe.
http://www.theskepticsguide.org/
I have several friends that got divorced in their 40s because they were dissatisfied with their men. But it was only because of the support of that man that they 'grew' enough to decide they weren't what they wanted......
ReplyDeleteYour post is deep, and makes me stop and think....would I be the same person I am today if I'd married my high school sweetheart and not had children? The basic roots of me are the same in my relation to things like food and music, children and animals....sometimes that scares me...but basically I am still mostly the person I was even in choice of bicycles....I love my first old bike sadly gone(first hubby sold out from under me) the one with coaster brakes and no gears....Hot Wheel/Matchbox cars still turn my head...oh the list goes on...this was a great blogging opener...can't wait to read other ideas!
ReplyDeleteChibi: thanks, I will check that out. I'm not totally sure about the work/talent thing though - my brother is a natural musician and never seemed to have to work at it; it just spilled out of him playing by ear. He did have to learn to read music though! You're totally right on the attention/recognition thing. It's amazing how many people I've seen on crutches since last June, when I never saw any before!
ReplyDeleteRosie: yes, an interesting paradox isn't it..
Karen: pfft, I can see why first hubby didn't last, selling your first bike!! I had Hot Wheels and Matchbox cars too, still have my favourites :-) You're right, some basic things don't change, but how we react to what life throws at us does, I think.
Maybe it's like some people shine ultraviolet light onto us, it shows up things that other people can't bring out or see.