Books and un-related stuff

Somehow it seems wrong that it being November last night I woke up half a dozen times in a hot sweat.  First the PJ top came off, then the bottoms, then the duvet off... nooo that's too cold.  It must be this winter duvet my friend G has lent me, will have to have the window open tonight!     

But on the good side, my leg didn't ache enough to keep me awake; I had toyed with the idea of taking a DHC before bed, but my policy at the moment is take each 12 hours as they come in that respect.    

I liked Karen's idea of going somewhere I could lose myself, I think that place would be the library or a bookshop... the library is safer otherwise I would end up buying books!  I'm a sucker for them, especially reference books. 

You can trace our interests over the last 20 years by the books on our shelves: cars, mountains, bees, boats, car trimming, horses, interior design, plants, the English language, psychology, guitars, criminology, French, car rallying, history.  Not to mention all the usual atlases, dictionaries and encyclopaedias.  Some of them we haven't looked at in years but would never get rid of them; who knows when you might want to look up details about the valve seats in "Tuning the A-Series Engine" or the contribution of Gaelic to the English language?

Yes a bookshop or library is definitely the place to go to lose myself.

Power napping & Comfort food

After writing my earlier post I dropped off to sleep for about 15 minutes... I woke up thinking it was morning and wondering why the music was on!

Well it did the trick, gave me the energy to cook myself some comfort food and do the washing up.  I compared my comfort food with the recipe Karen sent me for Tomato and Potato Mash and reckoned that it qualified as a variation. No potatoes and a jar of Fajita sauce instead of tomato bisque soup. Courgettes instead of tinned veg. No cheese; and served with rice.  Yep almost the same ;-)

Identity crisis...

I have discovered a replacement for red wine for making me feel better in the evenings: a long, hot shower. Admittedly it's not quite as sociable.   If I'm feeling really down, or tired, or my leg's hurting I know that a shower will make things better. I feel as I am cushioned in a warm cocoon where there is no stimulus except for the shampoo bottles on the shelf. No distractions, I can just revel in the hot water and steam; and there is no point in crying in a shower because it all gets washed away.

A hot dressing-gown off the heated towel rail and then into PJs and that pile of washing up that I've been ignoring doesn't look so bad.

But it can still wait until later, until I'm in the kitchen anyway to cook tea.  Now I'm resting my bones after work.  Today I've been having second thoughts about stopping the DHC (dihydrocodeine) tablets because my hip and thigh have been hurting today.   I was talking to my best friend G about it, because she is also taking DHC for a broken collar bone that she did before Christmas and still isn't mended.  I always think of pain as being a sharp, stinging, burning, breath-gasping thing, not this continual, deep aching; so when people ask me if I'm in pain I tend to say 'no it just aches', which makes it sound like a pulled muscle or something.

Now I can't decide whether to go back on them, or just 1 a day instead of 2, or is that just making myself suffer?  When I came off them I was determined I didn't want to be on them; I even came across a study that suggested ibuprofen was more effective which I used to convince myself I was doing the right thing.   My doctor is away until the end of November, but anyway as G says they tend to say 'take them if you feel you need them' so it's up to me anyway.

Sometimes we just want someone else to make the decisions.

I was feeling this evening as though I have been turned from a strong person to a weak one.. not quite on the lines of Samson but I can imagine a bit how he felt.    I don't like being like this; I don't like feeling brain-dead after a 6 hour day, or not being able to face the washing up, or having to think of something for tea, or thinking I really should finish Chapter 3 of my course book but not having the mental energy. 

I don't feel like Me.

Feathered friends

After breakfast I spend 5 minutes just watching the birds in the back garden, there seems to be a lot of them at the moment, constant flitting to and fro: Blackbirds throwing leaves around and grubbing around in the vegetable patch. Tits finding bugs on the trees and hedge, and popping in for some suet off the feeder. It's a hive of activity out there.

Yesterday I watched a Blackbird carefully remove some leaves from the bird bath (well, throw them out actually) before he could have his morning ablution.

The Greenfinches seem to come along for their breakfast a little later, they are definitely lazier and I can imagine them having a lie-in.

Spot's Spot: Donuts

Had to share this short video with my new friends - this is me when the humans gave me a new treat... best with sound ;-)

(sorry it's a bit dark)

"Nurse!!"

My friend is going in for key-hole surgery on his knee next week, redoing a previous op that didn't work, and he's not looking forward to it.  So I thought I'd make him a little card to cheer him up and this is what I came up with....

Rambling on

Yesterday turned out ok, having woken up feeling so lousy and telling everyone that I wouldn't be coming into the office (I got about 3 texts saying "can I get you anything?" bless them) I didn't feel like much breakfast so sneaked in an episode of Downton Abbey (Maggie Smith is so brilliant!) on ITVPlayer before work. Such decadence!

I then worked in my PJs in bed and thankfully didn't have too many e-mails. Monday's usually present a bulging inbox as I have USA mails sent on their Friday afternoon and Aussie mails sent on their Monday, if you see what I mean.

Multi-tasking....

I was feeling quite a bit better by lunchtime and my best work friend (to distinguish her from my best best friend) E called in for lunch and bearing posh biscuits, so we sat and chatted and gossiped; and she reminded me that I am supposed to be getting myself better, not worrying about getting into the office; although she understood why I wanted to go in.  Apparently the boss had said he wasn't sure how I felt about him visiting, so I said to tell him he can come anytime; usually he will just come over if there are specific things he wants to discuss with me.  I have a great relationship with my boss, based on mutual respect; I am one of the few with whom he will share ideas about the future, and other subjects where he needs a sounding board, and we get on really well.

So at 3.30 I got a call from him saying "Do you fancy a cup of tea in half an hour?" and he turned up with very fattening jam and cream iced buns, and we just chatted about all sorts of things that are going on with work; and what our personal plans are for 3-4 years time.  I think he was pleased to have an excuse to escape from the office for an hour!

I was halfway though Episode 5 of Downton Abbey when my Friend from the North phoned (the flaky one who was going to visit but didn't) and we had a great chat, very upbeat and light hearted. He knows now that he's not allowed to lecture me on health care so only made one wee comment and then said "I'll shut up now".  No matter how flaky he is with commitment to arrangements, I do know that he cares about my welfare.

So all in all it turned out to be quite a sociable day!

Now I have to wait until next Monday to watch the next episode of Downton Abbey - damn, I knew I should have saved one...

Best laid plans

I woke up this morning to a full on head-cold; body running hot and cold and generally feeling lousy (could this be a low dose of those 'flu-like symptoms'...?).  So needless to say I have cancelled my trip to the office!

I'm really wishing I'd bought some of those frozen pain-au-chocolats I saw someone with at the supermarket till last week - perfect comfort food. 

They are on my next shopping list.